Contact

A few points to consider first:

1. I have no money, so don't waste your time suing me. That would suggest you are egotistical enough to think that everything may be about or related to you. That would never do. Besides, the site admin spent all their money on Monster Munch years ago.

2. If you have taken gross offence at someone daring to have some fun with an area such as this, I'm afraid I don't care (your long dead great great great great great uncle Frank probably finds it hilarious). So, if you have mounted your high horse, donned your coat of righteous indignation, and are about to vent, I implore you not to waste your time. Humour and parody are part of life, so if you don't like it, don't read it. Sending a shitty email telling me how black my aura is will not miraculously inspire a contrite turnaround, it will however provide much hilarity and forwarding.

3. If you don't have a sense of humour, or don't like mine, I don't give a shit to be honest, so I don't want to know, so again, please don't waste your time - I'm sure there will be a nice transcript of a Ben Elton or Jim Davidson show for you to enjoy somewhere on the web (see point 3a).

3a. No, I don't know where to find such things. Mount Doom, where pure evil is forged may be a good starting point.

4. If I have mis-spelt something, used incorrect phraseology, or poor grammar (probably)...I don't want to know. Life is too short and so is my patience, and as chuffed as you may be at having found something to gleefully (if not anally) take the time to scratch out an email telling me about, I will be far too busy trying to get a life or playing Sims2. Sorry.

5. On the other hand, if you are of sound mind and have something nice to say, a question to ask, or especially enjoyed something, drop me an email...us web wastrels thrive on validation (and chocolate). It would be nice to know just once that all this isn't in vain.

Thanks!

Lackey@thesepticcircle.com